Heartbroken? Check out these 6 things to remember while going through it!
1. It’s Not Over.
You can and will, love again — should you allow yourself to.
Love is for the courageous. We do it again and again even with risk of disappointment and pain. We still love again.
Many times after heartache we find ourselves settling for passing pain that we think is everlasting. Time heals all wounds.
We write off future plans and potential relationships because we’re stuck in a rut with a heavy heart.
And though it may be heavy, keep your heart open and discerning. You never know what’s waiting beyond your healing.
2. Don’t compare what you had to what you have.
Relationships leave their mark, even the most loving ones. But for toxic, damaging relationships, the scars we carry, we tend to wear like battle wounds, showing them to our next lover to make sense of, to heal, to put a bandaid on.
A misstep we often take is bringing remnants of our past lover to any and all potential situations and connections.
That shows a sign of premature healing. Take some more time or separate the two. They are not to be compared and there is no relation — you’re just trying to find common ground. And you may miss out on some great things if you’re always finding your past in your present.
3. Know if change is necessary.
Self reflection is key in heartbreak. Don’t make the same mistakes as before but determine if it was even a mistake to begin with.
Is changing yourself worth it? No one is perfect, but if you know that you committed the best version of yourself to your partner—don’t change. Don’t question or doubt your heart and character. You’re a rarity.
4. Don’t have sex with your ex.
You would think this would be an unwritten law, because we know the potential consequences, but it happens everyday, b. Familiarity, comfort zones, fear of moving on or the unknown, good sex…whatever your reason — don’t do it. You’re toying with your healing process. Who’s to say old feelings won’t arise? Or you both decide to give it one more try already knowing the outcome? A heartbreak is transformational. You can’t go back to the same dimensions — or back to the same person who isn’t your ideal mate. Let go and let yourself be great. 😎
5. Don’t lose your romance.
Some men and women who have been hurt in the past harden themselves to romance, the little things of like and love that make us smile, our bellies flutter. They either briefly neglect it or abandon romance altogether.
They deprive the next person of the charm and excitement a new bond brings. It’s not fair to either one of you if you’re flame is burned out because of your exes’ transgressions.
There’s beauty in romance. Little things make the difference. So if you’ve lost your passion and willingness to make your partner feel special, sit this one out. Try again next time when you feel renewed and can really give it your all.
6. Understand your vision may be warped.
Heartbreak has its effects on the mind and body — there’s scientific evidence of such. It affects the way you think and how you interact with others.
Pain can be a deceiver. When we experience pain, it changes us and our perception, sometimes for the moment, sometimes forever.
Our sensitivities grow, we become extremely delicate to casual conversation and references, people, places, not realizing we’ve changed. We think others are the problem, instead of reflecting on how our experiences alter our realities. So know where you are in your healing timeline, and be aware of how your pain plays out in your life.
So remember, while you’re going through it, this too shall pass. Keep these things in mind to help you keep pushing!
You may be interested
The Purge: Evolution.Kiki Wilson - May 15, 2019
It's more than an art show, it's a re-introduction for the artist, Ms. Jeph. Watch her process. (more…)
The Rules of Summer 2019.Kiki Wilson - May 12, 2019
Summer is here! Well not quite but we'll take it. Are you ready for warmer days? (more…)